When Life Begins at Seventeen

They say that all good things come to an end. Or that the end of something is the beginning of something new. And that everything happens for a reason.

But still, when it happens -in a totally unexpected way- it sucks. And it hurts.

Back in September 2007, when I first set my foot in this place, a total stranger to the fashion/media industry, I was half-expecting to be entering a world filled with snobs, bitches, cat fights, and all those other negative things that'd pop in one's mind when one hears the word 'fashion magazine' (remember the movie The Devil Wears Prada?). As a coward who's not really into confrontations, I was naturally (very) nervous albeit feeling very excited and a bit giddy too.

But what I found was a place filled with some of the sweetest people ever: a wonderful boss and fabulous colleagues. After a few trials and errors in the working world, I finally found my place. I felt at home, at ease, and comfortable -perhaps a tad too much.

Then one sunny day, sometime around last week, our BOD called us all in to tell us that they will no longer keep our magazine alive. We all froze. Though we've heard of the rumors and picked up some hints beforehand, it was still a hard blow. That day became a day filled with tears -not out of fear of losing our jobs, but more out of fear of leaving this family and nest of ours.

I still think that not everyone is as lucky as I am, to be able to found a family like this in the (sometimes) cruel working world. I am blessed indeed, and will forever be grateful for that.

Life does begin at Seventeen for me, in a way.

During rehearsal for Seventeen Exclusimode 2009

This place has given me the most exciting two years. Two years filled with too much laughter and some tears (of joy, sadness, or stress). Two years of learning, failing, and succeeding. Two years of overcoming some ups and downs. Two years of working with the best colleagues who later become some of the most wonderful friends.

Two years made into a colorful chapter in my life. 

Yes, perhaps the time has come for me and my colleagues to leave our nest. Sad really, that it has to end in a rather abrupt and tragic way. But maybe it is time to fly, to challenge ourselves more, and to shine brighter.

Thank you all, for making my time here so sweetly memorable. We shall meet again of course, though in a slightly different way (and place). But there will always be the lunch breaks, coffee breaks, ciggy breaks, and after office hours to catch up with each other.

For this is not farewell, but merely a goodbye.

 Our last issue, on a cupcake

I will also miss this corner of mine dearly.. 

where I've had my (many) coffees in front of my lousy PC

Viva La Resolutions

I've said earlier that I'm not making any resolutions for this year. But after a while, I decided to make one because I simply need it.

And my 2009 resolution is:

To wake up earlier everyday so I could reach the office on time.

So far I've failed numerous times. LOL. I'm not a morning person. But this morning I managed to do it and came to the office at 9 a.m. (I know that's late for most people but trust me, that's considered early in my place, because most of the times we came at 10 or even later).

Well, the main reason of my 'success' was because I had to finish some work and send it this morning. But hey, turns out I can do it. Hahah.

And over the last week, I've been looking at my friends' albums of Coldplay's Viva La Vida tour in Singapore recently, feeling so jealous and full of regrets of missing yet another opportunity of seeing them performing live.

Yes, another good opportunity -wasted, again. I was offered a free ticket during the X&Y concert a few years back by someone, which I had to refuse because I was so broke I couldn't even afford the plane ticket. This year I thought that I shouldn't go because, well, SGD is so high lately so it's better not to get myself broke afterwards.

BIG mistake.

To top up my jealousy, turned out there was Christian Lacroix 'The Costumier' exhibition at National Museum of Singapore around the same time. Argghhhh! Please, just kill me! Kill meee!!

Okay. So, I've made another resolution:

The next time Coldplay's coming down again for another concert in Singapore (most probably for their latest album), JUST STAB ME (or slap me or wank me -whatever!) if I don't hop into a plane A.S.A.P. to see them!!

And may this resolution be fulfilled.

Amen. 

Defining "Normal"

So I'm finally single again. Officially. After months of ambiguous status.

There isn't a real feeling of loss. Not anymore. I probably have gone through that feeling even before we agreed on saying, "It's over." Not much tears too, since I've used up most of it on the last few months.

Before, I looked single and felt single but I was still attached. Now I look single and feel single, and is really single.

Not much of a difference, eh?

I told one of my best friend today that I'm finally the new single in town. He congratulated me and I bet he was relieved to finally hear that. He told me that for once, he'd like to see me with a normal guy. Hopefully one who's going to be around when I need him.

I laughed it off and said, "Define 'normal'. That's rather relative, right? Just like 'nice' is relative."

"Yes. True. But just look around -that's what I would call normal. Heheheh."

Apparently he thought my exes are (mostly) abnormal. Then he carried on defining what would be 'normal' for me.

"One that's quite well accomplished, but still has the time to see his girlfriend."

"One that's quite well to do, so he could support his girlfriend's needs of certain liquid substances, and her urge to eat garnish at fancy restaurants."

"One that's fun and trusting, so he wouldn't try to keep his girlfriend away from her friends and of course from a certain charming chubby guy with a cap on." (that would be him -the chubby guy).

"One that's smart enough, but not cocky and condescending or acting like he's some sort of a superior breed like the Aryans and see others as the Dravidans of the society."

"Isn't that normal?"

I cracked out loud after what he said. The guy sure understands me a lot. Thank gawd for a buddy like him.

So any of you guys know any 'normal' guy around? Do give me a buzz or drop me a message. Meanwhile, I'll be mingling, flirting, and enjoying my singlehood until it's time to let it go again.

Cheers to that! And may the power of lychee martini be with me -as always.

Zsa Zsa Zou

My my..
There's this feeling
inside my tummy
that I can't quite explain.

It's somewhat queasy
somewhat ticklish
somewhat chaotic!

Ooh.. I know
I'm feeling
the zsa zsa zou
making me all
topsy turvy!

I hope this funny feeling
is a sign of
something lovely to come.

Butterflies

"It's actually good if you don't feel the butterflies in your stomach. That way you could see things rationally. Who knows, they (butterflies) might come later along the way."

"But where's the fun part? That queasiness you feel inside is what makes it all more exciting."

Well, I've learned that most times, the butterflies will get you nowhere near happy endings. That all the exciting flutters inside will eventually bring heartache and tears too.

But still...

Should I just go forth with it in a very level-headed manner, or should I wait for the butterflies to come fluttering by?